She’ll remind me I’m alive
But they all would qualify
Somethin' that I never got, oh

She knows that I’m a chancer
Just a little duck and dive

Oh, I’m like a lot of men
And be happy to comply

But I won’t be again

For a bit of you-know-what

Pullin' old night fighters
In a restaurant
Now I’m stalkin’ this old Doris
I know this is all about
She’ll remind me I still feel
Yes, I’m behind, behind with the rent
Where the self-respect all went
But I’m behind, behind with the rent
And a bit of wheel and deal
I’ve been stitched up like a kipper, old son
Well, this crumpet’s past its sell-by-date
And I’m behind, behind with the rent
There’s smoke and flames behind me
Hell hath no fury
Just a little shellin’ out
Comin’ on like a gent
With lascivious intent
And I’m behind, behind with the rent

They’re gonna be lonely