oh honey, give me one more chance

"you went away,
you can't come back."

sometimes always ~ jesus & mary chain w/hope sandoval
sometimes always (live) ~ jesus & mary chain w/hope sandoval

that old saying goes you can never go home again, and yet i know i've tried a few times in my life. not to "home" per se, at least not the "home" of my childhood. new people live there, a few times over, and i'm sure it would look nothing the same. and home as a notion, as a feeling, as a meaning - well, i'm still looking for the place to call home. to me, though, "home" are the people i care about, the people who become part of the stories of my life, the people i love.

so, what happens when you leave something, or someone, for a variety of reasons and try to go back home? is it true that you can never go home again, even then?

sometimes my mistakes glare and stare and poke me in painful ways. though i hold strongly to the belief of not hanging on to too many regrets (i've never wanted to be a bitter soul), sometimes regrets are unavoidable. i guess forgiveness is harder the older we get, though i try to extend it to those who offer, and i try to extend it to myself. but who am i, truly, to decide that for anyone else. perhaps i forgive because i mess up so often.