Review: Weezer's "The Red Album"
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Artist:
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Album:Weezer (The Red Album) Deluxe Edition
WeezerWeezer (The Red Album) 5 out of 10 If rock ‘n’ roll were high school, Weezer would have probably been that kid in fourth period who gets all the answers right, but gets stuffed into a locker as soon as the bell rings. Not this time, though. This year they're back, and they're running for prom king. With song titles like "The Greatest Man That Ever Lived" and lyrics that tout "I'm gonna be a star/ And people will crane necks/ To get a glimpse of me/ And see if I am having sex," they're no longer the kids that got picked on during 1994's debut Weezer (aka The Blue Album) and 1996's Pinkerton; no sir, geek is in and they know it. With this new makeover, it's hard to believe that the boys on the so-called Red Album are the same old "Buddy Hollys" from 1992. I remember I used to be unable to sleep the night before a Weezer album was released. And here I am now, heart-broken, knowing that I'll probably never pop this new album into my CD player again. Unfortunately, with new Weezer, that's become the norm. I believe there are two types of people who are going to buy this album: those who've heard the first single, "Pork and Beans," and are intrigued enough to want more; and those longtime fans nostalgic and hopeful enough for a great album from the group to buy in. Everyone else has tuned out somewhere in between. And for that subset of fans still holding out for another Pinkerton, Weezer's 36 minutes of sheer artistic brilliance that combined delicate harmonies and intimate lyrics with unapologetic distortion and bass, your wait is not over. I'm sorry, folks, but on this one it's just not happening. The first three Weezer albums and I were inseparable. I'll never forget a journal prompt in the seventh grade which asked what you’d pick if you could take only one thing from your house in a fire. I chose my Weezer CDs. I've bought duplicates of Weezer (The Blue Album), Pinkerton, and Weezer (The Green Album) because the originals were so scratched. Then there was that morning I begged my mom to take the day off work and allow me to miss school so I could be the first in line at the record store to buy Maladroit. I bought three gold, numbered copies: one to listen to, another to keep mint condition for when it would become a collector's item, and the last one to replace the first should something happen. I'm not crushing so hard anymore. I started talking to guitarist Brian Bell last year when he decided he liked my "look" and wanted me on the cover of his side-band's album. Through the wonders of Myspace, we soon started talking and seeing more of one another. Coffee turned into dinner and dinner turned into "Lets go back to my place so I can play you the new Weezer songs." Once I got over being super-fan, I started to really pay attention to the songs. I was as impressed as a kid in a candy store. I was optimistic and full of hope for the new album and told all my friends to expect big things. I was even more stoked when Weezer announced that the new release would be another self-titled album with their signature front cover, a photo of the four of them against a colored background. The versions of the songs I heard, however, were raw. Little did I know what producer Rick Rubin and the band would do with those vulnerable demos. In particular, I think the "hip-hop-infused rock" approach that shows up in "The Greatest Man That Ever Lived" is best left to Linkin Park. The first twang of the guitar and they’re off! "Troublemaker" opens The Red Album with some crunchy power chords and playful drum beats. The vocals are there and the hook is there; what more do you need from Weezer? How about some less pedestrian lyrics that don't involve the word "faker"? (Rivers sings, "I'm a troublemaker/ Never been a faker/ Doing things my own way/ And never giving up.") "The Greatest Man That Ever Lived" begs the question: Is music better high? Most people would say yes. Between the police sirens (yes, I said sirens in a Weezer song), the structured harmonies, and Rivers's rapping, this Queen knock-off has led me to believe that Weezer might still stand a chance if everyone is high enough. This song is five minutes and 52 seconds of sheer madness that will leave any Weezer fan wondering what just hit them. A delicate piano juxtaposes the sirens in "The Greatest Man That Ever Lived" as Rivers ironically raps as the tide turns to a chorus done in the style of "man-metal" that washes out into a sensitized acoustic solo. A beer chorus chanting "After the havoc that I'm gonna wreak/ No more words will critics have to speak" caps it all off. And this is the same guy who penned "My Name is Jonas?!" If you've heard enough "Pork and Beans" to last you a lifetime, then the mellow sounds of "Heart Songs" might be more your type of tune. It sounds like a hip-hop producer is trying to inject some "boy-band" into my beloved Weezer, as the over-produced song about Cuomo's musical influences gets too Boyz II Men for my taste. Over-production is at its finest when Weezer get wrapped too tightly in calculated hand-claps and vocal enhancements in "Thought I Knew," sung by Brian Bell. In fact, on this album, Rivers was kind enough to also include "Cold Dark World" sung by bassist Scott Shriner, and "Automatic" sung by drummer Patrick Wilson. It's nice to hear other members for once, but the tracks don't really fit with the rest of the album; I think Rivers should just write and sing Weezer songs and let the other guys express themselves on their own solo albums. From the catchy, beautifully poppy intro of the sixth track, "Dreamin'," you think you have your old pals back for a minute or two before they're snatched away by super cheesy vocals halfway through, unintentionally reminiscent of a Tenacious-D song. I admit it. Hearing "sex you" sung on a Weezer album is pretty ironic. Weezer might even be teetering on funny with The Red Album. Maybe it's just me, but I didn't wait three years to hear cheesy, ironic songs being sung about "angel girls in cold, dark worlds." I want to ask them, "Couldn't you be funny on your own time? Isn't that what side projects are for?" The album’s awkwardness can be attributed to Cuomo's embrace of popular culture. Cuomo seems to be settling and getting more comfortable with his "nerd/rockstar" paradox; we liked Rivers before when he was uncomfortable and penning songs like "Across the Sea" and "Falling for You." Please spare me the "if you don't like this album, then you're not a real fan" spiel. Just because I'm not happy with being cheated out of a good album doesn't mean I won't support them. No, I'll support the purveyor of my youth even if they decide to do an entire album of Mariah Carey covers. As long as there's a Weezer, there's a Weezer fan in me still making a "W" with my hands for all to see. I think I just prefer them in the garage rather than in Beverly Hills.
Comments (12)
Bravo, I really liked your review. I wrote one myself about this album the day I bought it, and I think I was a little too forgiving. You really hit the nail on the head.
Merci Trend!
Unfortunately Egadman, there was a bug or something and the song had to be removed. What I meant by ironic was the fact that RIvers's embrace of pop culture and all things mainstream is TOTALLY sincere. Him rapping? That's not him trying to be funny-that's him showing us the real deal. Sadly though, as an avid weezer fan, it just seems awkward and silly to me.
The 'Let's Write a Sawng' is really entertaining. last semester my roommate and I would sumbit videos for it. It's a lot of fun, but Mr. Cuomo has yet to pick anything of ours.
and amen to you, pinkerton!