Just to make you jealous of the men she fucked before you met her
To all the ones that hated me
To all the ones who thought they knew me
She's the kind of girl who gets her slings and arrows from the dumpster
Lift your hats off to the checkout girls with tattooed backs
The most a toast, you really had me going
She's the kind of girl who looks for love in all the lonely places
You got me this time but I'll get you back
Sorry that I chose so poorly
They'd make an angels skin crawl
The kind who tells you, she's bipolar just to make you trust her
To all the ones that hated me
There's an even chance, you'll get a number
Who was mine in '99?
She's the kind of girl who only asks you over when it's raining
Just to make you lie there catching water dripping from the ceiling
Who get to masticate them
The most a toast, you really had me going
The kind who comes to poker pockets stuffed with kings and aces
She's the kind of girl who leaves out condoms on the bedroom dresser
If you ask them for assistance
Queen takes jack
I've a prize for each and every one
Golly gee, am I the poster girl?
Am I the poster girl?
Of you so just be patient
To all the girls at pearl, the surly boys
Better keep a healthy distance
Now it's up to you
So pick a number to all the ones who tried the most
For a second I was nervous, boy
Best a test to prove your prowess
For a second I was nervous, boy
Am I the poster girl for some suburban sickness?
I want last names and current status
Was I supposed to cheer your efforts
