Ahh, ahh, ahh
Well, I just had to laugh
Nobody was really sure if he was from the House of Lords
Woke up, got out of bed
I saw a film today, oh boy
Found my way downstairs and drank a cup
I'd love to turn you on
Made the bus in seconds flat
And though the holes were rather small
But I just had to look, having read the book
Found my coat and grabbed my hat
The English army had just won the war
They had to count them all
And somebody spoke and I went into a dream
He didn't notice that the lights had changed
And though the news was rather sad
I read the news today, oh boy
I saw the photograph
Dragged a comb across my head
He blew his mind out in a car
Four thousand holes in Blackburn, Lancashire
And looking up, I noticed I was late
Now they know how many holes it takes to fill the Albert Hall
Found my way upstairs and had a smoke
They'd seen his face before
A crowd of people turned away
A crowd of people stood and stared
