(Aah)
(Yeah?)
(Oww)
Flashed the bartender, then stuck my dick in the tip cup
'Cause I hung my original self from the top bunk with a belt
Am I comin' or goin'? I can barely decide
(What? Who?)
And by the way when you see my dad?
Hi kids, do you like violence?
And stapled his nuts to a stack of papers
Put a bulletproof vest on and shoot myself in the head
My English teacher wanted to flunk me in junior high
Wanna see me stick Nine Inch Nails
I ain't had a woman in years and my palms are too hairy to hide
(Go ahead)
For one second?
(Huh?)
Hi, my name is, my name is
(Oh, thank you)
Walked in the strip club, had my jacket zipped up
(C'mere)
You ain't got no tits
Hi, my name is, my name is
Got pissed off and ripped Pamela Lee's tits off
Tell him that I slit his throat in this dream I had
This guy at White Castle asked for my autograph
Hi, my name is, my name is
In a spaceship while they screamin' at me, "Let's just be friends"
Can I have the attention of the class
(Huh? What?)
My name is Slim Shady
I'll have to be carried inside the cemetery and buried alive
(Yeah, yeah, yeah)
(Damn)
(Huh? What?)
Faster than a fat bitch who sat down too fast
(Wah)
Thanks a lot, next semester I'll be thirty-five
C'mere slut
I lay awake and strap myself in the bed
You know you blew up when the women rush your stands
I don't give a fuck, God sent me to piss the world off
My name is Slim Shady
So I signed it "Dear Dave, thanks for the support, asshole"
And try to touch your hands like some screamin' Usher fans
Try 'cid and get fucked up worse that my life is?
(Shady, wait a minute, that's my girl dog)
My name is Slim Shady
I'm steamin' mad
And smacked her so hard
(Uh, huh)
All my life I was very deprived
Hi, my name is, my name is
(Dude, can I get your autograph?)
I knocked her clothes backwards like Kris Kross
My brain's dead weight, I'm tryin' to get my head straight
(Fuck that)
I'm not ready to leave, it's too scary to die
My name is Slim Shady
(Get him)
My name is Slim Shady
And Dr. Dre said, "Slim Shady you a basehead"
When I was little I used to get so hungry I would throw fits
Extraterrestrial, runnin' over pedestrians
I spit when I talk, I'll fuck anything that walks
Clothes ripped like the Incredible Hulk
I smoke a fat pound of grass and fall on my ass
(Huh? What?)
I just drank a fifth of vodka, dare me to drive?
(Hachhh-too)
Dr. Dre, don't just stand there, operate
My name is Slim Shady
Well, since age twelve, I've felt like I'm someone else
I smacked him in his face with an eraser, chased him with a stapler
Through each one of my eyelids?
Hi, my name is, my name is
How you gonna breast feed me, mom?
Hi, my name is, my name is
Wanna copy me and do exactly like I did?
(What? Who?)
But I can't figure out which Spice Girl I want to impregnate
(Huh? What?)
Stop the tape, this kid needs to be locked away
Ninety-nine percent of my life I was lied to
(What? Who?)
My name is Slim Shady
Make a record about doin' drugs and name it after her
Ahem, excuse me
(Yeah, yeah)
(Huh, yup)
I just found out my mom does more dope than I do
I told her I'd grow up to be a famous rapper
(Umm)
Hi, my name is, my name is
(Wah)
Uh, uhh, So why's your face red? Man you wasted