Be our guest, be our guest, be our guest
Flabby, fat and lazy
When we were useful
A culinary cabaret
You'll be our guest
Let us pull up a chair
Be our guest, be our guest, be our guest
Let us help you, we'll keep going
You've won your own free pass
With dessert, she'll want tea
As the dining room proudly
You walked in and oops-a-daisy
Go on, unfold your menu
After all, Miss, this is France
It's a guest, it's a guest
While the flatware's entertaining
Put our service to the test
Clean it up, we want the company impressed
Life is so unnerving
Ah, those good old days
With my fellow candlesticks
While the candlelight's still glowing
And we're obsessed
With your meal, with your ease
Needing exercise, a chance to use our skills
Don't believe me? Ask the dishes
But the banquet's all prepared
We tell jokes, I do tricks
It's ten years since we've had anybody here
Und it's all in perfect taste that you can bet
Why, we only live to serve
To be our guest
Wine's been poured and thank the Lord
And greatest pleasure
If you're stressed
They can sing, they can dance
Suddenly those good old days are gone
While the cups do their soft-shoein'
Soup du jour, hot hors d'oeuvres
But for now, let's eat up
Pie and pudding en flambe
'Til you shout, "Enough, I'm done"
Needing so much more than dusting
Heaven's sake, is that a spot?
She's our guest, she's our guest
Ten years, we've been rusting
As you digest
And, my dear, that's fine with me
Be our guest, be our guest
For a servant who's not serving
Presents, your dinner
It's fine dining, we suggest
Come on and lift your glass
And now, we invite you to relax
I'll get warm, piping hot
Sakes alive, well, I'll be blessed
I've had the napkins freshly pressed
Be our guest, be our guest
That we welcome you tonight
Try the gray stuff, it's delicious
Our command is your request
He's not whole without a soul to wait upon
I'll be bubblin', I'll be brewin'
For you, our guest, she's our guest
You're alone and you're scared
And we provide the rest
Course by course, one by one
Tonight, you'll prop your feet up
We'll prepare and serve with flair
Oui, our guest, be our guest
Tie your napkin 'round your neck, cherie
Then we'll sing you off to sleep
We've got a lot to do
Beef ragout, cheese souffle
Is it one lump or two?
And a dinner here is never second best
Most days we just lay around the castle
Take a glance and then
Yes, indeed, we aim to please
No one's gloomy or complaining