Upon me it's never lost
The faithful you uproot
Left my troubles far behind
My name is Simon Keeper
Lessons learned on Daddy's knee
Now I ain't the most honest man
For the shills that grease the skids
Jesus was a carpenter
"Give no quarter to the weak"
A man you each know well
Gather 'round now people
This is the story of a half-hearted man
Then one day tryin' to bum a light
The heights you'll never reach
Pretending not to care about
Living hand to mouth
From my darling one
About a lost young man in a faraway land
Irony oh irony
You are a bitter fruit to eat
Irony oh irony
And brother that was it
Stripped of all your beauty
A job in the towers cooking the books
Jesus was a carpenter
You grow upon the open plain
Upon me it's never lost
He died nailed to a wooden cross
Irony oh irony
Fifty-four and a big black mark
Irony oh irony
I found selling off what you don't own
I was caught with my hand in the cookie jar
Might earn you the time of day
Closed their lives to me
Upon my resume
I'm here to tell a tale
That ever worked a skim
"What's yours is mine, what's mine is mine"
Your flesh is none too sweet
Kicked around 'bout a year
About reaping what you sow
About a man who walks among you
I felt my will give out
I had a wife and three grown kids
You are the polar seed of truth
Next it was a letter
He died nailed to a wooden cross
One by one my children
Started prayin' a little too loud
Now I won't start in preaching
When I saw them empty their pockets out
Whose life is just too easy to sell
Irony oh irony
Sat right down on a corner
But sit on down and rest a spell
You are a treacherous son of a bitch
Sealed with a hug and kiss
Irony oh irony
I've got another tale to tell
Half honest as they go
