The sun was comin' up
I did a somersault
Cool it with her dad
But I didn't know how
Underneath the stove"
But she got out of the way
"You unpatriotic
And told him
At the bottom of a wishing well"
I said, "I like Fidel Castro
There for a spell
I was standin' on the steps
At my head and I did run
Feelin' most alone
I guess he knew I wouldn't lie
That I'd milk his cows
I think you heard me right"
I immediately tried to
What a nice, pretty farm he had
He cocked his rifle
He said, "What do doctors
Saying, "I dig farmers
And stuck a gun into my guts
"Just one condition
To the FBI
In his garden flowers
And I been to college, too"
Well, out comes a farmer
I'm a doctor and it's true
I said, "Yes, ten thousand miles
He said, kinda sly
I said, "No, no, no
Rita looked offended
La Dolce Vita
I'll show you up to the door"
And I was runnin' down the road
He said he's going to kill me
She said, "Would you like to take a shower?
Constant, on the sly
Even though Rita moved away
That you don't touch my daughter
I was sleepin' like a rat
There stood Rita
So I yelled out
Without freedom of speech
I knew I had to split
"I like Fidel Castro and his beard"
Unless the old man chased me out
Well, he threw a Reader's Digest
And got a job in a motel
She looked like she stepped out of
He still waits for me
And crashed through the window
'Bout her mother on the hill
He wants to turn me in
He must have thought that I was nuts
"You're that travelin' salesman
I said, "Hey, hey, in there
Whose name was Rita
Well, I couldn't leave
When I heard something jerkin'
To my bended knees
"I guess you're tired"
At me with all his might
In two seconds flat
As he came charging down the stairs
That I have heard about"
And in the morning, milk the cow"
At a hundred miles an hour
And began to shout
I've been through this before"
I had to say something
Rita mumbled something
He immediately looked at me
Me, I romp and stomp
I'm a clean-cut kid
And ducked as he swung
"Would you like to take that shower, now?"
Rita said, "Come back"
And landed fully blast
As I seen him get his gun
Don't shoot me, please"
Thankful as I romp
I fell down
'Cause I'd already promised
To strike him very weird
Then in comes his daughter
As he started to load
Rotten doctor Commie rat"
Today I drove"
Know about farms, pray tell?"
I was mighty, mighty tired
As his fist hit the icebox
Is there anybody home?"
Well, by the dirt 'neath my nails
I had gone a long, long way
Sayin', "What's that I heard you say?"
If I don't get out the door
He said, "I got a bed for you
When she said
And you go to sleep right now
Well, I don't figure I'll be back
Lookin' just like Tony Perkins
I said, "I was born
I said, "Oh, no, no
