So I look like a walking mountain range
Carry the New York Times, shoot a few holes
I got knocked down and my head was swimmin'
I ask you how things could get much worse
Out to the country club and the golf course
But if you think that I'll let Barry Goldwater
She sticks my boots in the washing machine
And he went and did the cat instead
And ordered him to do the dog
Well, I don't know, but I've been told
Well, I set my monkey on the log
And my wig-hat was falling in my face
I'm gonna grow my hair down to my feet so strange
She's funny wants my money, calls me, "Honey"
He wagged his tail and shook his head
I want everybody to be free
He's a weird monkey, very funky
At the sorority sister's home
If the Russians happen to get up there first
Is what this thing here is for
You must think I'm crazy!
Hope I don't blow it
Blow their minds
I'm everybody's brother and son
Dreams of strangling me with a scarf
Yippee! I'm a poet and I know it
Move in next door and marry my daughter
I ain't different from anyone
I wound up with the Dean of Women
I figured, I was ready for Cassius Clay
Sticks me with buckshot when I'm nude
The streets in heaven are lined with gold
Now you're probably wondering by now
I had my white shorts rolled up past my waist
What's probably got you baffled more
Five, four, three, two, one, Cassius Clay you'd better run
Just what this song is all about
14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, gonna knock him clean right out of his spleen"
It's nothing
It ain't no use a-talking to me
26, 27, 28, 29, I'm gonna make your face look just like mine
But they wouldn't let me on the tennis court
Now they asked me to read a poem
Now, I'm liberal but to a degree
Waiting to play tennis in the noonday sun
And I'm gonna ride into Omaha on a horse
When my name comes up he pretends to barf
I gotta woman, she's so mean
It's just the same as talking to you
I've got a million friends!
I said, "Fee, fie, fo, fum, Cassius Clay, here I come
I was shadow-boxing earlier in the day
Puts bubblegum in my food
Stabbing my picture with a bowie-knife
Now I gotta friend who spends his life
99, 100, 101, 102, your ma won't even recognize you
Wowee! Pretty scary!
I wouldn't let him do it for all the farms in Cuba
I sat with my high-heeled sneakers on
