If I Had $1,000,000

I'd buy you furniture for your house
If I had $1,000,000

(You could help, it wouldn't be that hard)
(If had $1,000,000)
(We wouldn't have to walk to the store )
If I had $1,000,000
Like open the fridge and stuff

And if I had $1,000,000
If I had $1,000,000
Well I'd buy you an exotic pet
And if I had $1,000,000
If I had $1,000,000
I'd buy your love
If I had $1,000,000
Well I'd buy you a house

Mmm, you know, they have prewrapped sausages
(If I had $1,000,000)
Well I'd buy you some art
Of course we would, we'd just eat more
(If I had $1,000,000)

I'd buy your love
Well, can you blame them? Yeah

But we would eat Kraft Dinner
And there'd already be foods laid out for us
If I had $1,000,000
And buy really expensive ketchups with it
(If I had $1,000,000)
(I would buy you a house)
(Oh all them crazy elephant bones)
If I had $1,000,000
Like little prewrapped sausages and things

If I had $1,000,000
I'd buy your love

(A Picasso or a Garfunkel)
And if I had $1,000,000
If I had $1,000,000
If I had $1,000,000
Well I'd buy you a monkey
You know, we could just go in there and hang out
(If I had $1,000,000)
That's right, all the fanciest ketchups, Dijon ketchup
But they don't have prewrapped bacon
Well I'd buy you a green dress
(If I had $1,000,000)
(But not a real green dress that's cruel)

Mmm, mmm mmm
(But not a real fur coat that's cruel)
(Like a Llama or an Emu)
If I had $1,000,000

(If I had $1,000,000)
A nice Reliant automobile
(If I had $1,000,000)
(If I had $1,000,000)
(Maybe we could put a little tiny fridge in there somewhere)
Well I'd buy you a K Car
(I'd build a tree fort in our yard)
Maybe a nice Chesterfield or an Ottoman
If I had $1,000,000
(If I had $1,000,000)
If I had $1,000,000

(We'd take a limousine 'cause it costs more )
While I'd buy you a fur coat
Well I'd buy you John Merrick�s remains
And if I had $1,000,000
(If I had $1,000,000)

If I had $1,000,000
And if I had $1,000,000
We wouldn't have to eat Kraft Dinner
(Haven't you always wanted a monkey?)