I make Madonna faint
The President plays golf with me
I pat the dogs and cats
I'm the man of the year
Where I never broke the rules
I'm the man of the year
I'm the man of the year
Will anybody care
And later I will meet the Lord
I bet He just can't wait
'Cause I'm the man of the year
My urine tests are perfect
I laid in perfect state
Or miss a day at school
My prostate is a jewel
Stand in line to meet the man
To meet the man of the year
So why am I so lonely
Depressed and in despair
'Cause I'm the man of the year
I eat a low fat breakfast
If I pull this trigger in my mouth
I never cheat at finals
I never lose anything
The Queen made me a knight
It was the greatest funeral
I'm a graduate of Harvard
My car keys or my hat
I'm never, ever cruel
I'm never, ever jealous
I tie a perfect tie
The Pope made me a saint
I'm the man of the year
I kiss the wife, I hug the kids
