And he said, "What do you think? Now don't hold nothin' back"
And I know you've been using a cut-rate thesaurus
It won't take too long
And I said, "This song's got a broken hook
Your injector ports are stripped and that ain't all"
Well, I gave him my most sorrowful look
I can fix it for you, sonny
That dominant chord with the augmented fifth
When he finished singin', he gave me a smile
Just see how dangerously high it raises you up
You've got a bad safety problem with
I hate to be the one to give you this news
I can fix it for you, sonny
He said, "I've got the time and I've got the parts
But don't be downhearted
It won't take too long
And your main prodsponder's nearly gone
But don't be downhearted
And that water pump's nearly down a quart
It may be a hit
He sat down and played me a song by the grease rack
We caught it all in time, so you're in luck"
Now your verse is runnin' on verbs that are way too weak
"Those spark plug wires are a little too long
I can straighten this thing out for eig ehh, nine hundred bucks
It'll just take money
But don't be downhearted
Just give me the word and I'm ready to start
You guessed it
Then he said, "Aren't you that songwriter guy?"
So just go on over and work on my car
Your timin' belt's done shrunk one size too small"
I can fix it for you, sonny
And I closed my eyes and pondered awhile
'Cause your adverbs have backed up into your chorus
I'd keep her under fifty beats per minute
I mean, that's just me talkin', it's really up to you"
But your whole melodic structure's done worked itself loose"
"The torque converter's runnin' low on torque
And I said, "Yes, I am," he said, "So am I"
"It's got so many dotted eighth notes in it
I'll sit here by the fan and chances are
It'll just take money
And I can order you a new one from Nashville but it won't be cheap"
It won't take too long
And I said, "Hold on friend now I'm not through
I think we can bring her in for eight hundred bucks"
