Did you ever go to eat a pork sausage....
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Artist:
and find its got hairs all over it?So, luckily for me, my sense of humor was pretty much fully formed by the time I was 14. That means I can still enjoy The Dead Milkmen. Way back in the day The Dead Milkmen, on their album Metaphysical Graffiti, introduced me to some people that I still like to visit frequently:There’s Cousin Earl. Earl runs a maggot farm that has 3 foot maggots. He does not like it when you confuse maggots with worms because a worm farm is for worms and a maggot farm is for maggots.His son Earl Jr. Earl Jr. had a tractor accident. This left him a bit strange in the head and he spent all of his college money dialing 976-Pigg and 976-Sheep. That’s right: Pigg with 2 Gs and Sheep which has 5 letters. He’s a sick boy.His daughter Eppie Sue, who looks more like a big pile of fungus than a little girl.His wife. No one knows her name because she doesn’t talk much. In fact, she can only say Dog-pussy. That’s right – it’s one big hyphenated word and it does not mean “dog and cat.â€They even introduced me to their dinner: a wall eyed bass that Earl caught. It was a 27 eyed wall eyed bass and it could talk before Earl cut it open.And, of course, I have to mention Sarah Jane who they introduced me to in a different track on the album, although I don’t think she is related to Earl. Her hobbies include lowering children into open manholes. Which is kind of difficult because a lot of the children are taller than her, her being a midget and all. Not only a midget but a lesbian, left-handed, albino Eskimo.That is all. I don’t think I had enough coffee this morning. Or I had too much. Either way.
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