The Arockalypse is February 8th.
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A lot of people say to me, "Brendan! I know you to be a fan of Finnish Monster Metal Band Lordi; when's their movie coming out?"Okay. Not one single person has said anything even close to that. In point of fact, I am the only person I know who is looking forward to the Lordi movie. In any case, it premieres in Finland on February 8th. No idea when it'll make it to the US, but I'm betting on a straight-to-DVD release here. Here is the official trailer (No, it's not premiering on August 2nd as the trailer seems to suggest. Remember that our European friends, in addition to being Rhapsody-impaired, write their dates incorrectly.)(I kid! I kid because I love!):I have to say I'm a little nervous. I like the haunted hospital thing (me and my friend Dominic were the only people who watched Kingdom Hospital): hospitals are inherently horrifying places where there are far more deaths per capita than just about any other kind of building. So far so good. But it looks like they're going to try to make this a real, straightforward horror movie. I see two problems with this. One: the brilliance of Lordi is in their cheesiness; if they're going to try to be un-cheesy, well, I'm not sure if they might not lose some of the magic. Two: the very presence of the latex-clad Lordi might insert some unintentional hilarity into what looks like an otherwise serious movie.But, then again, the bar for movies starring bands in makeup is set very, very low. Behold six minutes of KISS Meets the Phantom of the Park, a TV movie from the 70's. I have watched this entire movie two times. I'm sure not even Gene Simmons did that. The whole thing is up on youtube; if you have some sins you need to atone for, watching it might make a suitable penance. This particular scene evokes a great philosophical conundrum: what's worse, the special effects, or Paul Stanley's acting? Discuss!
Comments (8)
Holy shit a Lordi movie. Did this ever actually happen or was it just a stoner metalheads wet dream? Hopefully he's a better writer than Rob Zombie.