What is this "MTV" you speak of?

When one factors alcohol and boredom into anything, the results are, more often than not, bad. Last night's combination of the two happened to be catastrophic. I was at my friend Matt's house and we were hanging out, drinking beer and playing video games. Well, at one point, Matt dissapeared, so I flipped over to the VMA's to see if Jack Black was doing anything of note. No dice there. I was "blessed" with seeing Beyonce perform that one single that sounds like the other one of that new album that sounds a lot like her old one, you know. I flip back after the break and see something that set off more anger towards MTV than I have ever had before. And this in the era of Laguna Beach, My Super Sweet 16 and all the other quality programming shoved down our throats by the powers that be. After some award for something dumb was presented to a shitty band, a curtain on the right side of the stage goes up and POOF! The Raconteurs start playing their new single "Steady, As She Goes". In my inebriated state, I think "Jackpot! A good musical performance!". Of course, MTV dashed my dreams under their dastardly heels. About thirty seconds into the song, they CUT TO COMMERCIAL! COMMERCIAL! Not even a minute into a band who is actually doing something ORIGINAL, they cut to a commercial. But not before they talk about the next presenters: Fall Out Boy. Christ in Heaven, how can you let such cock-smokery happen? Needless to say, I yelled and screamed at the TV, but the commercial still ran, and I flipped both the channel and the people who plan this kind of bullshit the bird. So, to make a long story short (too late) I am no longer going to view anything on MTV. No matter how drunk, no matter how bored and no matter how deprived of seeing Shakira do that dance in the video with Wyclef, I will watch MTV no more, forever. Unless, they change the channel to "The Spoiled Rich C*** Channel". Now THAT would be truth in advertising.