James Versus Jim: Results Just In
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Album:Southern Rock's Best
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What's in a name? Don't ask me, I'm only here to present lame, ill-researched, nonsense blogs. Having said that, I do honestly believe, with every last vodka-tainted cell of my long-since lost liver, that people called James are invariably worthy of death, and chaps with the handle of Jim are pretty alright human beings.May I present my less than convincing argument...*JAMES BELUSHI:* Beware the talent-free, coat-tailing brother. See also James Keach.*JAMES VAN DER BEEK:* Woefully wooden "heart-throb" thesp, perhaps notable only for a forehead on which one could comfortably land a Chinook.*SIR JAMES GOLDSMITH:* Late, unlamented megalomanic UK magazine publisher and failed political candidate, who once, rather than sue the satirical magazine Private Eye which he felt had defamed him, took legal action against a string of mom'n'pop independent retail outlets for selling it. King Bastard behaviour.*JAMES AND THE GIANT PEACH:* It may seem churlish to pick on an animated figure, but that little dude really freaks me out for some reason.*JAMES BLUNT:* Come on, do I really need to plead a case here, people?(Notable exceptions: Cagney, Taylor, Earl Jones)Now we get to the good guys...*JIM ROCKFORD:* Could any other 1970s TV 'tec have made something as mundane and as functional as an ansaphone machine look so iconic?*JIM MORRISON:* As self-important or as overrated The Doors might have been, The Lizard King at least looked the part.*JIM REID:* Dour and despondent to the max, but the recently reformed Mary Chain are still the ultimate in ennui atmos.*SLIM JIM PHANTOM:* Beyond the perfection of his name, the erstwhile Stray Cats drummer remains the epitome of standing-up skins bashing.*JIM(I) HENDRIX:* Blues-wailing, axe-thrashing, Zippo-lighting, Fender-flaming, groupie-shagging, vomit-choking genius. Truly, the first and last of his kind.This theory has been examined, assessed, analysed, amended, verified and declared water-tight by no less than 12 of the planet's 17 leading lexicographers. Therefore, its author will brook no dissent or debate.*This has been a Terry Staunton presentation, in association with Good Cop Bad Cop Productions*Coming soon: Richard versus Dick, Elizabeth versus Liz, Robert versus Bobby, John versus Johnny, William versus Bill, Sandra versus Sandy
Comments (19)
James Joyce, greatest writer in the English Language/20th Century (because Shakespeare, William trumps him and everyone else).... although I know his buddies did call him Jim.... hmmmm I think my personal life has funnier James v. Jim stories.... I am Greek and have dozens of cousins named Demetrios, which is the Greek name for James/Jim. Each of my Demetrios cousins uses the Anglicized version to his advantage in a different way....
Demetrios, the Federal Prosecutor is JIM. Not James, but Demetrios, which you must call him or JIM.
Demetrios, the under cover cop is JIMMY, or Demetri, and when his wife is mad at him, James.... or when you want to get his attention: James. But he's never Jim.
Little Jimmy is precisely that... Little Jimmy. He's the spoiled brat Prince of the pack... his dad, my uncle, owns a diner on sweet property worth millions... that he bought for nothing over 30 years ago. Yeah - a Chicago Greek diner... very John Belushi/SNL material... anyway, Little Jimmy is Jimmy.... no one but no one calls him anything else.
I had a boyfriend named Jim. His dad calls him Jimbo, because his dad is also Jim. I don't know.... still.... I find the concept GREAT COMEDY!