Hammered on a Toxic Tuesday
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Success is a fickle thing. Just ask Oakland, California homey MC Hammer. One minute, he's up to his harem pants in beaucoup bucks after his across-the-board smash with the jibber-jabbery "U Can't Touch This" - a self-aggrandizing rap-lite appropriation of Rick James' funk landmark "Super Freak." More than 10 million copies sold of Please Hammer, Don't Hurt 'Em, the 1990 album that featured the track; network TV appearances; arena concerts; mega-mansion in the East Bay hills; equally lame follow-up hit "Too Legit to Quit"; yada, yada, yada. Then, suddenly, nada, nada, nada.
Oh sure. These days, he can be a judge on VH1's "So You Think You Can Breakdance" or appear as the guest homeowner on "Cribs of the Formerly Flush." But a return to pop music stardom - no matter how fleeting? Not likely.
And that may be due to the universe punishing him for having produced the truly toxic "U Can't Touch This." More like "Won't Touch This." Unless you happen to be a masochist. If so, touch the play button, watch the silly undulations and outré fashions, and hear the prattle.
Locating MOG account...
Comments (19)
I wouldent touch this with a three foot rubber dick!
He definitely cornered the market on those ample butts of the time; including his own in those pantaloons of his.
I was never a fan of the gay pirate look he had.
Happy it never caught on...unlike the song, I guess. 10 million copies you say? Whoa! Truly scary.
Not to mention that song was used for a long time here in Connecticut by an electric company to caution people to find out where the power lines are before digging...ostensibly to prevent unintentional electrocutions (as opposed to the intentional ones from people really sick of hearing this thing ad nauseum).
If that was an attempt to turn a toxic tune into a positive PSA, well, it unfortunately meant I had to hear it another 30 or so times...so any socially redeeming value would have to be negated by that fact.
"U Can't Touch This" passed muster with me until now, I confess, but that's only because I'd never heard of Rick James's "Super Freak." One hope that James received his proper share of royalties from it and "Ghost Busters." Mike, thanks for cluing me (and us?) in.
U can't touch this? I ain't even gonna try
I think "Pray" might be even worse, speaking as a Christian that prays regularly even. Even the riff from "When Doves Cry" gets dragged through the mud.
pour another round and turn the sound down, willya Mike? I actually got to see the act live in it's heyday, as he opened for my girls gotta-see TLC at the local theme park's amphitheater. Seemed about as novel as the Ringling Bros. clown troupe to be honest.
Then, there's a later and much darker family connection that will have to wait until the autobiography...no play for me sir!
Spike, you have truely aged yourself. Not knowing who Rick James is......
Regardless, I am a life long Atlanta Falcons fan, so therefore "Two Legit" will always have a place in my heart... but not in my speakers... the rest of it was top 40 pop garbage back in the day, and I was at an age where pop was not kewl in 1990.
Ok, you probably knew Rick James via Dave Shapell (or however you spell his name) but to quote a bumper sticker...
To know Rick James, is to know Super Freak.
No Super Freak, and you dont know Rick James.
He was more than "Rich Biatch"
Ghost in You, I've liked Rick James's "You and I" only by discovering it later on a used LP, but wasn't listening to the radio enough at the time to notice "Super Freak." Shoot me. :-) I age myself in many other ways as well.
But ... she was a very freaky girl... the kind you don't take home to momma...
Words.. to live by.........
If you need more abuse here's a Rick James vs MC Hammer mix.
All you super-freaks - step off!
dansemcabre: Where wouldn't you?
Dabeef: But...but...butt...thanks for the mix.
Fasted7: Yep. 10 million sold. Like some kinda stomach-turning McAlbum.
Spike: It was nothing, sir. Really. Nothing. And aged? Like a fine wine!
dmdm: And thus, saved from the infection.
Dale: More like "Prey," if you ask me. Or "Carrion."
scotfree: Clownin' is never pretty. Funny, maybe.
Ghost in You: Freaky-deaky! And hat would be "Chappelle," in case you're writing a check or sending a subpoena.
I played it. And quite loud at that. Now if I could only get the Chipmunks to cover it....
Now, look what you made me do...
OH MY MY!
AHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHA
/LAUGHTER TEARS
Your wish is my command, Anna. (heh)
Look on the bright side - all those Prince samples saved the guy from bankruptcy.
The bright side? More like the downward slope.