Toxicity Can Lead to a Corpse - and Vice Versa
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The Day of the Dead has passed again - as usual, right after All Saints Day and Halloween. And today's the next day, a new day - a Toxic Tuesday. But I've still got death on my mind. Make that death-metal - the half-ass, lowbrow bastard son of punk-rock and heavy-metal, scourge of ear drums and brain pans everywhere, and grislier cousin of what's know variously as thrash-metal or speed-metal.
Although you could say that it's arrogant of me, I feel sorry for the angst-ridden whelps who listen to this garbage in order to stew in their own isolated misery, self-loathing and undifferentiated hatred, reinforce their sense of alienation, or blow off steam. Because, like, it sucks. And since the amps that the metalloids use are usually set on "11," good luck to their fans hearing anything past the age of 40 - that is, if they don't die before then in a suicide pact with one of their fellow death-metal fans.
As for the rest of you, I dare you to expose yourself to Morbid Angel or Nevermore or, better yet, Cannibal Corpse - a Buffalo, New York death-metal band that's been around since 1988 - performing the oh-so-ideally-titled "Make Them Suffer." The musicianship? Not bad, considering the accuracy of interplay required for such relentless hammering. But lots of bands can thrash at high-speed and hit their marks. And what passes as vocals? Nothing more than a throat-decimating roar meant to imitate the voice of your typical hell-spawn demon from a second-rate horror film. Sorry, dude. This ain't "The Devil's Rain," let alone "The Exorcist" - and you're not Lucifer.
I guess a steady diet of this dog-meat is all well and good if you're wacked out on meth. The less damaged among us might be more inclined to shake our heads in pity, and avoid it.
So here's a promo clip of Cannibal Corspe's "Make Them Suffer." Just remember: You possess free will.
Comments (17)
Wow- those bobbing heads look like the dudes in that Best Buy commercial.
It's easy to see- and hear- why the singer keeps his face obscured from the camera: shame.
Trash metal, indeed.
ouch!
I've tried a few of these, but like the old elevator muzak - it all sounds the same. not sure if the max-volume note is valid though, I still suffer Deep Purple induced tinitus from an earlier age, yet no regrets!
Fasted: At least it's not rash-metal - although a dermatologist would know better than me,
inrumford: In this situation, no Band-Aid will do.
scot: Oh, it's valid. I'd offer the same admonition to any fans of the various brands of hard-rock.
huh? whazzat??
STANDING OVATION... BRAVO! I could not have posted it better myself Mike the Knife... BRAVO!
.....I have to say, in the Band's defense..........Its better than a sharp stick in the ear.
But hey, Mike, I listened! I had familiarity with this track so i figured...what the hell, why not? Now I know why not.
I meant to say....i had NO familiarity.....
This proclamation coming from a deadmans pile o bones.......
I think I heard him say thank you so much. Ah, that's nice. At least he's a nice young man and hasn't forgotten his manners. His parents should be proud.
scot: I didn't say anything. Did you hear me say something? Would somebody answer the phone?
Ghost: I bow with a flourish.
dmdm: Hear here!
MusicRX: Alas, he killed his parents and ate them. At least, I think so...
Oh Mr. Mike - I don't think I can go near that rotting corpse. I can, on occasion, tolerate Sword Metal, but the death metal is far too rancid for me.
Ha! it's strange to see cannibal corpse posted sarcastically, Mostly death metal fans take themselves very seriously (deathly seriously) lol! and Extreme metal is usually posted only by fans of the genre and eschewed by everyone else. I will admit to listening to and posting some death metal or screamey/singy metal tracks and as a guitarist often find myself playing with speed metal and other tricks of the trade to blow off steam. But my taste in music is so broad as to include tracks from just about every genre imaginable.
Great Toxic post, Metal taken to it's cartoonish extreme!
Frankly, the 30 seconds of Cannibal Corpse visible (and audible, ugh) during "Ace Ventura, Pet Detective" is enough to pass me a lifetime, thank you very much.
This is definitely the funniest thing I've seen in a while. Your scorn is well-deserved.
I swear I saw Lucifer playing air guitar in the middle of that video.
Cannibal Corpse is reserved compared to most of Norway's death metal scene, where church burning, Nazi regalia, animal heads as part of onstage mise en scène, killing bandmates and songs about necrophelia is all in a day's work. The whole genre's incredibly fucked up.