Toxic Tuesday
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Artist:
That's right. I'm going to start a theme day of my own - one that pays homage to the worst music ever. Sure, it may only manifest in this sole post. And I've seen similar MOG posts before, but I know that there are some songs and recordings that suffer from such serious suckage that they must be acknowledged. And they are legion, so singling out just one would be wrong and misleading. Nonetheless…
Alvin & the Chipmunks is the long-running novelty act that was originally derived from producer Ross Bagdasarian multi-tracking and speeding up his voice to record a Christmas single. In short order, Bagdasarian (a.k.a. David Seville) began covering the hits of the day as the Chipmunks. It's a tradition that continues today under the aegis of Bagdasarian's offspring and has spawned a veritable empire of Chipmunks albums, cartoon shows, and even an inexplicably successful feature film.
In a fit of self-loathing last year, I wrote a MOG post about a Chipmunks anthology that I suffered through. There, I made my point of view crystal clear: One Chipmunks track - specifically originals like "The Christmas Song" or "Alvin's Harmonica" - could be tolerated as cute the first couple of times you hear it. A Chipmunk-ized version of a tired hit or a song that you already can't stand? Terrible.
I have put such an abomination on the MOG Player. That would be The Chipmunks' cover of "My Sharona" - the ever-annoying hit single by the faux new-wave band The Knack. It's an exercise in ear-splitting awfulness that might be unmatched by any other comers. Listen, if you dare. And we all know examples of extreme musical crap. Bring 'em on if you've got 'em. It's a Toxic Tuesday! 
Dive on in! (Sculpture by Tom Friedman)
Locating MOG account...
Comments (22)
Oh my gosh, that's brutal.
Coincidentally, the TV was advertising the latest Chipmunks compilation, and they actually had ... get this ... "Time Warp".
If that's actually the song from Rocky Horror, being done by the Chipmunks, I will hereby welcome the Apocalypse.
Just last night I had a father son moment with my eldest when we watched this. Coincidence?
Wow. The first part, before the vocals kick in, has an annoyingly catchy feel, much like the original (which had its finest moment, to my mind, in Reality Bites). But once Alvin starts singing ... ok, you're right, this is indeed the worst music ever. At least the Shaggs had heart.
Right off the first LP I ever owned. Swallow this playlist, if you can:
Side one
Side two
Pity me, please.
You asked for it;
http://craplister.blogspot.com/
.
As obnoxious as they are, The Chipmunks will always have a special place in my heart since they were a childhood fave. My parents bought my sis & I one of their albums of which we listened incessantly. Stupid kids, ha!
...and we have to have this one again;
.
...and I haven't even started in the Japanese and Chinese one's yet!
Sure, Mike- NOW my computer can open the link!
Just my luck....OUCH! Painful!
I will admit to laughing when the vocals first came on.
After that, the laugh turned to a brief smile which then quickly faded and turned to a sour, dour frown. then I was praying for it to mercifully end.
Toxic, indeed! I won't even attempt to find a song to top (or maybe 'bottom') your selection.
This kinda thing could make the Boomtown Rats revise their biggest hit to be called "I Don't Like (Toxic) Tuesdays!"
Dale: Alvin, Simon, Theodore, and Dave...the Four Horsemen? Aieeeeee!
lakposhti: I like to think of Weird Al as an antidote to all the crap. He can be very funny, but I have to admit that he can get on my nerves, too.
Masoo: The Shaggs were a trip. Bits of their magnum opus "My Pal Foot Foot" clang off of my synapses, like shards of the memory of a spell of indigestion. But it wasn't their fault. They meant well. Such naiveté. Such innocence. Such cluelessness.
nicki: Yikes-a-hootie! What a way to start out!
Neill: You may have trumped me with Leonard Nimoy singing his ode to Bilbo Baggins - and those others ain't no slouches in the worst-song sweepstakes, either. But I think that it's kind of cheating using videos. Those visual aids really hammer home the awfulness/ridiculousness of the tunes in question. Of course, bad is bad. In other words, bring on the Asians!
August: Again, one or two kiddie-skewed numbers from the 'munks won't kill one's spirit. Get them squeaking covers of lame "hits," and there's no hope.
Fasted7: Pleased to hear the player is working for you. Sorry it had to be on for this little horror. Don't worry about scrounging up more crummy music. I'm sure there are others who will willingly do the foul deed.
This is what I have to say to that:
I am afriad to unleash anything at this point, Groon and I went back and forth for a while and things got rather ugly. I think I will just sit back and cry for a bit
sadly, some of the vids aren't working. Still . . . I could barely make it through a quarter of the song before I had to stop it to save myself.
lak, however: genius. Love me some Weird Al.
TynansAnger: Pointed! And a hearty "Damn right!" to Biafra!
Rawk: That's okay. Dry your eyes, and leave it to the rest of us.
Groon: Sad to say that all the videos are working for me. So I feel your pain. (heh)
First of all CONGRATULATIONS for the new theme.
Second of all, this cover is so funny that I have tears in my eyes now. Honestly. Greeks' honour and all that.
If I may offer a humble contribution:
will there be a Wrathful Wednesday, Threatening Thursday, Furious Friday? i own a CD of J-pop stars singing American top 40 music in bossa nova style. one day, Knifey, i will make you listen to it. ;d
Ow Mike, I had earbuds in - directly plugged into that. My skull felt about ready to shatter into a million pieces. Good burn though, even if it wasn't intentional.
Oh. My. Gawd.
I thought that, having heard a couple of Nimoy cuts from the Golden Throats series, I had plumbed the depths of his awfulness and come out the other side. Little did I know know there was an entire sub-basement of wretchedness beneath that, which the Bilbo video has shown to my traitorous eyes.
Please - bring back the death penalty. Better yet, drawing and quartering. And have Leonard be first in line.
Anna: Crazy Frog must die!!! (And contact a French chef. We shall dine well after the deed is done!) Otherwise, thanks for the congrats. Now, let's see if I have the cojones to do "Toxic Tuesday 2: The Sickening."
poe: Oooh. Wrathful? Threatening? Furious? Methinks someone's unleashing a little repressed anger. Toxic knows no emotion - only its poisonous, debilitating nature. So bring on your Japanese Top 40 bossa nova! I'm inoculated.
p-wagz: Dude, I'm so sorry. I should have posted a warning...
dermahrk: Kind of amazing, isn't it? Nimoy - and his partner-in-space Mr. Shatner - really pushed the bad-taste envelope back in the day. I blame the Romulan ale.
Dermahrk - Do have a copy of Nimoy singing that song about a boy....what was the name???
Yup, still has it.