Passenger Seat - Warning..this could get deep...:P
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This song came on my itunes, and not only is it my favorite death cab song, it has quite a bit of meaning to me right now, both reasons a little personal but I'll share one of the two with my fellow moggers :) you're like my music therapy people! :P (As for the second, M-think of our ride home back from Sturbridge..read lyrics..and laugh with me - :) )
So in 3 weeks I'll be coming back to my hometown of Boston, the countdown has begun and it really is sneaking up fast. As you can imagine and I know you all can relate, doing something drastically different can be a mind boggling experience and take your mind ten different places at once that you just aren't settled in your own skin just yet till you arrive to your next destination. I can personally say i havent felt much of myself lately, its like having a different personality everyday, and i'm not going to blame it all on stress, but also that anticipation of getting home and feeling like i can begin concentrating on the things that mean the most to me, like M, my family, and most importantly, myself (and obviously i dont mean that in a selfish way, but its the greatest to work on yourself! :) I got some things that need a fixin aight?! :P). The uncertainty of coming home to a place i'm from but havent lived in for about 7 years can kinda make ya feel a little self-concious, no matter how strong i'd like to think i am. I've always thought of myself as a happy go lucky person always thinking positive and always looking for that great new something, a real go getter, and where i dont think that has changed, big changes like this can kinda of suck that positive feeling that I take so much pride in right out of me, and i coulndt hate it more :/ I feel like it might be silly for to dwell on such feelings but all i can say is i feel like i havent been able to "throw up" all the emotions lately i've been feeling...ya know..shake it all out!! Like Ben says in Lack of Color:
If you feel discouragedThat there's a lack of color herePlease don't worry loverIt's really bursting at the seemsAbsorbing everythingThe spectrum's a to z
I know in my heart that this is the right decision and the anxiety i'm having could darn right be that I'm just way to excited to get home and see where it takes me :)Phew!!! *weight lifts* thats a nice feeling :)
Passenger Seat - Death CabI roll the window downAnd then begin to breathe inThe darkest country roadAnd the strong scent of evergreenFrom the passenger seat as you are driving me home.Then looking upwardsI strain my eyes and tryTo tell the difference between shooting stars and satellitesFrom the passenger seat as you are driving me home."do they collide?"I ask and you smile.With my feet on the dashThe world doesn't matter.When you feel embarrassed then i'll be your prideWhen you need directions then i'll be the guideFor all time.For all time.
Till the next time New York...
So in 3 weeks I'll be coming back to my hometown of Boston, the countdown has begun and it really is sneaking up fast. As you can imagine and I know you all can relate, doing something drastically different can be a mind boggling experience and take your mind ten different places at once that you just aren't settled in your own skin just yet till you arrive to your next destination. I can personally say i havent felt much of myself lately, its like having a different personality everyday, and i'm not going to blame it all on stress, but also that anticipation of getting home and feeling like i can begin concentrating on the things that mean the most to me, like M, my family, and most importantly, myself (and obviously i dont mean that in a selfish way, but its the greatest to work on yourself! :) I got some things that need a fixin aight?! :P). The uncertainty of coming home to a place i'm from but havent lived in for about 7 years can kinda make ya feel a little self-concious, no matter how strong i'd like to think i am. I've always thought of myself as a happy go lucky person always thinking positive and always looking for that great new something, a real go getter, and where i dont think that has changed, big changes like this can kinda of suck that positive feeling that I take so much pride in right out of me, and i coulndt hate it more :/ I feel like it might be silly for to dwell on such feelings but all i can say is i feel like i havent been able to "throw up" all the emotions lately i've been feeling...ya know..shake it all out!! Like Ben says in Lack of Color:
If you feel discouragedThat there's a lack of color herePlease don't worry loverIt's really bursting at the seemsAbsorbing everythingThe spectrum's a to z
I know in my heart that this is the right decision and the anxiety i'm having could darn right be that I'm just way to excited to get home and see where it takes me :)Phew!!! *weight lifts* thats a nice feeling :)
Passenger Seat - Death CabI roll the window downAnd then begin to breathe inThe darkest country roadAnd the strong scent of evergreenFrom the passenger seat as you are driving me home.Then looking upwardsI strain my eyes and tryTo tell the difference between shooting stars and satellitesFrom the passenger seat as you are driving me home."do they collide?"I ask and you smile.With my feet on the dashThe world doesn't matter.When you feel embarrassed then i'll be your prideWhen you need directions then i'll be the guideFor all time.For all time.
Till the next time New York...
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