MOG

Just now, I was listening to Soundgarden's "Fell On Black Days," and bumped into Meaning. It's true that finding just the right song can be a wonderful experience, and I've found it the best when it happens accidentally.

It's a song that I like just for its pacing. Heard a Chris Cornell acoustic version first thanks to animamusika, then the studio version with the band on one of the albums that changed my love's life. I think I like both of them equally, which is not usually the case (tend to like acoustic versions better).

I like how it deals with the common reaction of "how could this have happened / Why did this happen so randomly?" so artfully. The rawness of it. It's something we've all felt - what's up with the injustice of the world?

I like the line "Whatsoever I've feared has come to life." It reminds me of events that re-animate fears and really force them at you. "Im a search light soul they say / But I cant see it in the night / I'm only faking when I get it right" reminds me of the sense of ineptness that happens when all your perceptions are thrown out of whack, and of times this summer where I felt uncomfortable with the idea of making mistakes, and like I wasn't doing anything right. The image of a searchlight soul is just striking.

I like that you want him to get over the days he fell on, because it gets over-the-top melancholy. You want him to stop complaining. And then he sort of ... does.

"So don't you lock up something that you wanted to see fly Hands are for shaking No, not tying No, not tying"

And then I dissolve into the release. The release and the certainty that rising up is amazing, that bad times are just a state we exaggerate. And then (at least tonight) I thought of the persistent end to the Hush Sound's "Crawling Toward The Sun." In the night light, we still shine bright." And then I realize that the darkest of days don't really stop us from shining.