MOG

I used to have an extreme hate for all things Bon Jovi. When I was a metal head, there was nothing worse than admitting that you liked a Bon Jovi song. I hated Jon Bon Jovi so much that I wished he would just go away. A co-worker (a school mate, but not friend) told me that Jon Bon Jovi was going to announce that he had AIDS and would be retiring. My brother and I's response: "Good I wish he'd die!"

Now I don't hate him so much anymore and I certainly don't wish him dead, but there are several songs of his that I absolutely to this day hate with a passion. One of them is I'll Be There For You. I think what infuriates me most about it is the rhyming scheme. It's semi-forgivable to rhyme the same word once, maybe twice, but Jon takes it to a new level with his unbelievable rhyme of the word "you" six times in a row.

The lyrics:

I'll be there for you These five words I swear to you When you breathe I want to be the air for you I'll be there for you I'd live and I'd die for you Steal the sun from the sky for you Words can't say what a love can do I'll be there for you

It drives me so nuts that I'm compelled to listen and fume in my head about the "You You You You You You Do You" rhyme scheme. I don't profess to be a poet, but it seems to scream laziness to not search for other words to rhyme than "you". Maybe Jon had a bet with Richi Sambora to see if he how many rhymes of "you" he could get away with.

It's not the lyrics that bother me so much, although a guy begging for his girl to come back doesn't exactly get me inspired. Besides, songs like this were definitely NOT written for guys.

There, I've got that off my chest. Stay tuned for my reasons why I'm compelled to shove forks in my ears than rather listen to "Living on a Prayer" or "Wanted: Dead or Alive."